Last week, I watched a CEO spend thirty minutes in a leadership meeting trying to "fix" his team's motivation. He strategized about market conditions, complained about generational differences, and even questioned his hiring decisions. Meanwhile, his energy was scattered, his tone was frustrated, and his effort felt reactive rather than intentional.

The irony? He was trying to control everything except the two things that would actually transform his leadership—and his team's response to it.

In our hyperconnected, always-on world, leaders are drowning in variables they can't control. Economic uncertainty, remote team dynamics, shifting market demands, organizational politics—the list is endless. Yet the most impactful leaders I coach have learned a counterintuitive truth: the less you try to control, the more influence you actually have.

This isn't about resignation or passivity. It's about strategic focus. When you channel your leadership energy into the only two variables you completely own—your effort and your attitude—you create a ripple effect that transforms everything around you.

Author Darrin Donnelly captured this beautifully: "I focus only on the things I have total control over: My effort and my attitude." As a leadership coach, I've seen this simple framework revolutionize how executives show up, how they connect with their teams, and how they navigate complexity with clarity.

Here's how it works:

Variable 1: Your Effort

This isn't about working harder—it's about showing up with intention. Your effort includes:

• Consistency: How reliably do you bring your best self to interactions?
• Preparation: How thoughtfully do you approach conversations and decisions?
• Follow-through: How dependably do you honor commitments to yourself and others?

Variable 2: Your Attitude

This isn't toxic positivity—it's conscious choice-making. Your attitude encompasses:

• Perspective: How do you frame challenges and setbacks?
• Curiosity: How open are you to learning from difficult situations?
• Empathy: How do you choose connection over control when emotions run high?

Think of these as your leadership dials—the only ones you can actually turn. Everything else? That's feedback, not failure.

Practical Application: Making It Real

🎯 Start Your Day with the Two-Variable Check-In

Before diving into emails or meetings, ask yourself:

• "What effort will I bring to today's interactions?"
• "What attitude will serve my team and our goals?"

This isn't goal-setting—it's identity-setting.

⚡ Redirect Control Conversations

When team members bring you problems they can't control, guide them back:

• "I hear your frustration about the market shift. What effort can we bring to adapting?"
• "You're right that we can't change the deadline. What attitude will help us deliver our best work?"

This builds clarity and empowers rather than overwhelms.

🔄 Transform Stress into Strategy

When anxiety hits during challenging situations:

1. Pause and ask: "Is this about my effort or my attitude?"
2. If yes: Channel that energy into action or perspective shift
3. If no: Acknowledge it, then redirect your focus

This creates emotional regulation and strategic thinking simultaneously.

🤝 Model Connection Through Constraint

Show your team what focused leadership looks like:

• Share when you catch yourself trying to control the uncontrollable
• Openly discuss how you're choosing your effort and attitude
• Ask team members what they need from your effort and attitude to succeed

This builds trust through vulnerability and clarity through example.

Leadership isn't about having all the answers or controlling all the variables. It's about mastering the art of focused influence—showing up with intentional effort and conscious attitude, especially when everything else feels uncertain.

The leaders who create the deepest connection, clearest direction, and most empathetic cultures aren't the ones trying to control their teams' every move. They're the ones who've learned to control themselves so completely that others naturally want to follow.

What would shift in your leadership if you stopped trying to manage outcomes and started mastering your input?

Take a moment this week to notice where you're spending energy on variables outside your control. Then, consciously redirect that same energy into how you show up and how you choose to respond. Your team will feel the difference before you even say a word.

Recommended Reading:

• "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey (Circle of Control concept)
• "Mindset" by Carol Dweck (Attitude as choice)
• "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown (Connection through vulnerability)